Sexting, the digital exchange of two or more unique messages, does not enjoy the best reputation. Too vulgar, too digital, then data protection and the like. Under sexting, our author imagined previously unsolicited penis photos and embarrassing pornographic dialogues, which could end up on the boss's desk. "Totally absurd," say his friends. “I've been doing this for 30 years,” says Barbara Schöneberger. So it's high time to try something on yourself. Even if it wasn't as easy as I expected.
by Miriam Kühnel
“Well, such naughty things,” I tried another attempted explanation at the table after trying to explain what sexting is for a quarter of an hour. I noticed that I didn't really know much either. Tim's incomprehensible expression revealed that he only understood the station. "For example, you write to me what you are going to do to me tonight." You had to be more explicit after marrying a mathematician. " Tonight? He asked putting a slice of pizza in his mouth. " I am not here. I dropped my head on the table. If we failed here because of the temporal relation to reality, I could already imagine what a sext would look like with him. "What are you wearing, honey?" I was sure Tim would write "sweatpants and adilettes" impassive. I realized: sexting with a fact buff could be tricky.
Sexting For Professionals: Sometimes You Need A Professional
I received professional advice. Horst Wenzel is an expert in flirtation and relationships and successfully runs the Flirt University. If he couldn't help me, who could? “Sexting can be learned,” he says. As for my husband, I wasn't sure he was ambitious enough. I asked Horst Wenzel if this was a bit acceptable for foreign sex. He advised me to discuss it with my partner. I decided not to do this. Maybe I would tell him later. Maybe not. He had never asked me if he should continue the sex scene in "Game of Thrones". It was a bit similar, wasn't it? I decided to look at it this way for a while.
Next hurdle: where the heck do you get a sexting partner from? I asked my crazy single girlfriend if she didn't know anyone. "Of course," she said, sending me Sven's cell phone number from Munich. The Sven, who was always up for something. I preferred not to ask more specifically. Munich was far away, it was perfect. Sven apparently already knew what his job would be. “You and I are going to have a lot of fun together,” he wrote and suddenly I realized what attracts people to sexting. I had no idea what Sven looked like or what he was doing. Maybe he was on the subway reading a comic book. Maybe he had a schnauzer and was only six feet tall. But I didn't care. In my head, it was an Adonis. A handsome guy who promised me pleasure. It was fascinating in itself.
I wanted to answer him. Not that easy if you have no idea what the sex is. "Are there any rules of behavior?" I asked Horst Wenzel to protect me again. "Of course there are," replied Horst. "Sure, you can write down your sexual thoughts, but it doesn't hurt to reread your own post before it's sent and ask yourself if your text is exactly what keeps spinning on the other, or if you push it maybe. too far. ”Phew. Write down my sexual thoughts. For them to turn on Sven? Can i do this?
I played the ball in Sven's field. "What exactly will this pleasure look like?" I waited nervously for a response. Sven was a long time coming. Meanwhile, I asked Horst why I was so nervous and felt like a teenager. “The most exciting thing about sexting is, first of all, that we let our thoughts run free. We have the opportunity to write down our sexual fantasies relatively without restraint. It is even more erotic to imagine the other person on the other smartphone, what they look like, what the body looks like or what they are wearing. Plus, it's just a nice feeling that someone shows their interest in us. »Mhh. He might be right about it.
When we talk dirty in Whatsapp, inhibitions fall
He finally beeped. Sven's response was more explicit than anything I had ever read. She made me red ears. Apparently the Lord did not lack confidence in him. I copied Sven's message and sent it to Horst. "Is this normal? I wrote indignantly. “Completely,” Horst said. “With sexting, inhibitions fall. When we discuss, we do not see our counterpart, we do not look anyone in the eye while we are explaining what we would like to do with him or her. I tried three attempts to respond to Sven, but felt a little silly describing my breasts to him. He wanted to be able to imagine it exactly. I did not know what to write. They had better times before, my breasts. But maybe Sven didn't want to know exactly. “You can learn sexting,” Horst had said. But somehow I suspected that I was writing something to a stranger on my somewhat deformed breasts.
My favorite expert Horst was able to tell me immediately why. It wasn't me and it wasn't sexting. Not even on Sven, not even on my breasts, just because I was in a committed relationship. Even though Sven and my thoughts were just words, we exchanged an intimacy that was actually always reserved for my partner. I managed to admit to myself that there was something there. It had been very easy to project my wishes on a stranger and get the attention of him that I would rather have preferred than my husband. It was the need to feel sexy and wanted again. But what would I do if a stranger found an idea of me sexy that didn't suit me?
Are men better at message sexting?
I decided to give my mathematician another chance. After saying goodbye to Sven and having long since turned to more consenting women with more shapely breasts, I typed a message to my husband on my smartphone. "What do you think is sexy about me?" I asked and felt a tingling sensation again when I sent the message. He also made me wait a bit, like Sven.
“I think it's sexy when you bite your lower lip during hot movies. I love your pajamas, which are a little sheer and it drives me crazy when you come out of the shower with your hair wet. I was flabbergasted. I completely underestimated him. And I didn't know all of this, but what surprised me the most: Unlike me, Tim seemed to know exactly how to sext. As I was about to answer, I heard his key in the lock. I threw my phone in the corner and quickly jumped into the shower.
Twenty minutes later, I stood in front of him in my wet-haired pajamas and saw him smile at me. " Pretty hot! He said walking slowly towards me. "Do we have to watch a thriller?" I asked, lustfully chewing on my lower lip. Tim laughed and stroked my wet hair. "I have a better idea," he said, kissing me in a way he hadn't done in a long time.
Do you also need an advisor like Horst? Horst Wenzel and his colleagues at Flirt University don't just advise sexting beginners. In seminars and webinars, he and his colleagues provide advice and assistance on all matters related to flirting.
